こんにちはみんなさん, how’s everyone doing? I’d like some help please concerning あげる, もらう and くれる. Most of the times I didn’t have any problem understanding the meaning behind each verb and it’s use. But lately, for some reason, I keep on confusing them. Can anyone lend a hand in understanding the situation here please?
あげる is from the speaker outwards - you’re doing something for someone
くれる is from outwards toward the speaker, initiated by the other party - someone’s doing something for you
もらう is from outwards toward the speaker, initiated by the speaker - you’re having someone do something for you
So:
払ってあげる - I’ll pay the bill
払ってくれる - you pay the bill for me (as a favour or whatever)
払ってもらう - I have you pay the bill (because I forgot my wallet or whatever)
And a slight addition since its not immediately apparent when you see it, causative verb te+morau means that you intend on doing/are gonna verb, but its usually a more polite.
Literally it utilizes the permissive usage of the causative. As in, to let something happen rather than to necessarily cause it directly like the name “causative” might incorrectly make you think. So in this case, you’ll saying ill have (もらう) you let me (causative) come in. In this case, あがる just means entering so 部屋にあがる is to enter a room or apartment in this case.
Naturally…hmm I hate translating stuff but I guess the most natural sounding thing to say that gets the same feel across might be “I’ll head on in for a bit” as opposed to “I’m coming in for a bit” to maybe make it a bit softer?
we kinda do the same thing in english to some extent. Like if I say “allow me to demonstrate” im really saying “I’ll show you” but in a more roundabout way I guess and im not actually asking for your permission.
No problem! Its a very common one, but it can be tricky if you’re not prepared.
So it’s basically the same as just saying ちょっと上がるぞ but you’re making it more polite by essentially phrasing it as if you’re asking the other party to let you come in. Quite a natural construction when you think about it like that.
Yep exactly. Its not actually limited to polite contexts despite that being the actual function of the construction, but its not like thats something unique to japanese. In fact, its often used in more sarcastic ways too.
Just to add, くれる tends to have a connotation of gratefulness baked into it. Sometimes it gets used sarcastically, but putting that aside, if someone does something nice for you, this is the word you’ll use to talk about it and/or thank them.
教えてくれてありがとう
“Thank you for teaching me / explaining (that) to me.”
Side note, when it comes to あげる and くれる, the speaker doesn’t have to be involved in the exchange. More generally, あげる is giving from someone close to you to someone less close to you, while くれる is the reverse.
I can’t remember the exact chapter in Genki, but I think もらう can also concern third parties where one receives something from the other.
But glad someone brought up the entire matter, because it might be that I’ve been misusing くれる, unless it’s okay in very polite requests as ~てくれる.
Ah, no, looks like my uses were passable.
That’s how I remembered it as well, but according to the basic chapter from Genki II on giving and receiving, I’m wrong and what @yamitenshi wrote is exactly the way that chapter explains it.
That being said, since Genki has the tendency to narrow the scope in explanations and not always cover all possible nuances, maybe what I wrote is still correct?
Sounds similar to English, using polite constructs to be sarcastic/mocking isn’t a strange concept (well excuuuuuse me, Princess!)
Yes, I worded that confusingly I think - the speaker is not the key part, it’s having someone else do something, you can use もらう to express that someone else has another party do something as well (at least, I’ve seen it worded that way: メアリはトムから払ってもらった - Mary had Tom pay the bill)
To clarify, as I understand, もらう is from the perspective of the receiver, not the speaker per se.
@gfyh455ji6wegrtjyaja your flashcard explanation is also correct, I think. It still matches up with how くれる and もらうwork.
What I was originally confused about were phrases like 教えてくれてお願いします, but I guess I learned this one wrong and くれるprobably wouldn’t work, because it’s effectively a request.
Edit: did some extra checks and the above phrase is definitely not correct, but found a good alternative with もらえませんか, ください and もらう.
あげる (Ageru) AH, sure, I’ll pay the bill.
くれる I like to think of the Ku as an arrow pointing toward me. You are doing ME a favor. もらう (Morau) Can you do one MOre thing for me, please?
EDIT: もらう (Morau) I received one MOre thing from you. (Correct me if I’m wrong or if this was already answered, but there isn’t necessarily an implication of having asked for what you received is there?)