First, I want to apologize for adding to the countless posts about feeling demotivated with Japanese, but I really need some advice about my situation—or at least to know if anyone else has felt the same way.
This isn’t the full depth of everything, but I’ve tried to give you context.
I’ve been living in Tokyo since last January and currently attend an N2-level review class. While I can understand a fair amount of what’s taught in class, I struggle with confidence and feel uncomfortable speaking or participating. I recognize the progress I’ve made over the past year, including taking the N2 exam twice (though I likely didn’t pass either time).
That said, my current focus is on finding a full-time job, which has been a soul-draining, demoralizing process. I’ve even considered going back to school because of how tough this search has been.
I know improving my Japanese, especially my speaking skills, could help with job opportunities. But honestly, I feel so unmotivated. To make things worse, I don’t have much money to go out and meet people, which limits my opportunities to practice and build confidence.
What really hit hard was a group interview I had for a part-time job recently. I was paired with a half-Japanese woman and a native Chinese speaker whose Japanese was incredibly fluent. Meanwhile, I found myself fumbling at an N4/N3 level and, unsurprisingly, didn’t get the job.
Speaking is by far my weakest area—it’s absolutely terrible. I can understand a lot of everyday conversations and sentences, but when it comes to responding, I freeze. Even having a Japanese girlfriend hasn’t helped much in this regard.
I know some people might think, “You’re just lazy,” and honestly, they might be right. I’ve lost all motivation for Anki, and grammar feels like my kryptonite. I’ll study grammar every day using Shin Kanzen Master, but then I won’t encounter it in real life and forget it within two weeks. Im tired of grammar.
I get it—improving requires consistent effort, speaking practice, and perseverance. But it’s frustrating to understand so much input while feeling completely incapable of turning it into output. I really wish there were another way to get better at this.
I miss the spark I had when I was learning Korean. Back then, I was so motivated—probably because I didn’t have as many responsibilities, and I was eager to go out, meet people, and immerse myself during my school days.
Deep down, I really do want to improve my Japanese. But right now, I’m unsure how to reignite that passion. Have any of you been in a similar situation? Should I take a step back and focus on enjoying anime or books again, even though I know that won’t help much with speaking?
I feel lost—like I have a goal but no clear idea how to reach it or how to make the process enjoyable again.
This community has been such a source of support for me during tough times, and I really appreciate all of you. If anyone has tips, experiences, or even criticisms, I’m open to hearing them. How do you stay motivated, or how did you overcome a slump like this?
I desperately wanna be more conversationally fluent but feel so far away from that goal.
Thank you all so much.
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