How do we tell which vocabulary is actually used in conversation?

Though Jisho’s range for common is kind of odd sometimes. Like… For “book” there’s 本 listed as common and 書籍 listed as common. Clearly one is more common than the other. I guess it just lets you know the word isn’t rare.

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Same here. I’ve always loved words, so I have a rather large passive vocabulary. I have notice that it gets easier with practice to not use “pompous” vocab in certain situations. Thankfully, I haven’t run into the ridiculing aspect, but I have run into the situation where my listener thinks I’m mocking them for their lack of vocabulary. Since that is not my intention, I do try to tone my sometimes excessive vocabulary down for them (they tend to be friends and family, otherwise I likely wouldn’t bother).

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This is why you have to get into language immersion ASAP. Immersion generally solves all your problems.

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I’m old enough that my elementary teachers used to say “vexed” all the time!

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I was thinking exactly the same thing. Want to know which words are “actually used” in x? Start watching/reading x! At some point you need to stop studying for studying’s sake and use what you’re learning.

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