Week 8: 傲慢と善良 😤😇 (Advanced Book Club)

This reminded me of something else I wanted to forget.
When 架 and 金居 met, 金居 used オレ and 架 used 僕. We know 架 is older than 金居. Does getting married and having kids make 金居 more of an adult? Is 架 still considered a boy when they are compared?

I haven’t written much up to this point because the book annoyed me a lot. I feel like a lid is open now. Sorry for the flood :sweat_smile:

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Personally I didn’t read that as obsession, but more the kind of thing some people do on Instagram especially if they’re not self confident – the photos of yourself you select kind of try to portray a view of yourself as attractive, happy and successful in a conventional, almost cliched way, which then looks odd to people who really know you well. And it says they haven’t been retouched (加工したわけではないのだろう), she’s just been using Instagram sepia and similar filters. So to me it kind of fit in with the general view we’ve had of her as a bit insecure, but not really out of line with how a lot of people are on social media.

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Yes, I read it wrong. It says “It does not seem to be retouched.” Still, she tries to look different. Besides, she rejected 金居 based on what he wears, not his personality or behaviors. She wanted to be with someone who looks good, before anything else. Then chose 花垣 just because he is handsome. All she thinks about is how others perceive her or her partner. It is not hard to guess that she chose 架 for the same reason. He is handsome and wears expensive clothes, knows how to behave in the presence of others. The people around her would approve of him.

Both 真実 and 架 want to get married because marriage is a status symbol for them. They have a wedding date but have not talked about having kids or where they will live after marriage. These are the first topics you discuss with your partner if you ever think about getting married. They almost see each other as must-have accessories.

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I definitely agree with you here. From the outset I’ve considered 架 and 真美’s relationship to be deeply flawed. They both seemed to be going through the motions due to familial or societal expectations, without taking the time to reflect on what they themselves want out of a relationship. And I think this is getting to 小野里’s point that those who find success are the ones who are confident in what they want, which is a bill that neither 架 nor 真美 fits.

I also see 架 and 真美 as deeply flawed in their own rights. I think 架 is a poor communicator and can be egotistical verging on masochistic. I think 真美 is manipulative and deeply insecure. There are clearly reasons that these characters ended up the way they are, some internal and some external.

I think where we disagree is that this doesn’t mean the book annoys me. I’ve actually really enjoyed seeing 架’s progress as he’s come to learn more and more about the woman he was going to marry. While the book’s gotten a bit dry at times, I’ve found the different perspectives surrounding marriage and dating (especially those rooted in a culture I’m still so unfamiliar with) to be mostly interesting. I also haven’t gotten the sense that the book is didactic or preachy. It feels more like an exploration of a central theme through the varied viewpoints of flawed but interesting characters.

I don’t know whether this analysis will hold up through the second half of the book, but I’m intrigued enough to find out.

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