This is a real concern for me. When marriage equality hit, I thought this is it, the world is moving forward and it can’t go back.
Sometimes I feel so naive.
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Yeah, I don’t think I worded that question well. I was thinking more of finding something in a book and having everything click, not finding a connection to your sexuality and your parents. I really related to reading something (on the internet) and going - OMG that is me and it has a name and it’s a thing and I am not a broken freak? - about the ace spectrum. I was somewhere in my 20s. Though I had been interested in guys and gals since some more conservative types might say I shouldn’t, or couldn’t, have been. Finally having the vocabulary to describe myself as a biromantic, probably-some-sort-of-asexual was just - woah!
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OH! Yes, I understand what you mean now… hmm…
When I was younger I was on the internet and just started to realize that I was attracted to men and not women. I didn’t read something and have it click. It just happened over time.
When I was in high school I watched Knocked Up and I remember being sad when I made the connection that I could never have that. I could never really get pregnant and have a child. This was a sort of beginning to a long discussion, of what is my gender? Do I have feelings strong enough to be consider trans. What does it mean for me if I am? Would I actually want to transition?
My personal journey has led me to, yes I am a woman, and would happily wave a magic wand and wake up as a women tomorrow, but I’m also in a man’s body. I think there are things for me to do in this life time that need to be done in a man’s body. Personal choice that despite feelings I don’t think I want to change my body, BUT I will always vote to giving anyone the right to live as their true gender and be protected my our laws.
So I may adopt later in life, and I can still be beautiful and gorgeous, and take a mans breath away, it just isn’t going to look exactly like my wildest dreams.
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Aaaahh okay, like that! In my case, I didn’t really have a single moment, the realisation process went so gradually I can’t even say when I knew and when I didn’t. I guess it might also have to do with the fact I was raised in a very progressive household so there also wasn’t a moment I had to discover the existence of LGBTQ+ people, I just… knew. (About non-binary people, my family definitely hasn’t been aware of them for long, I think I was the first even, but still with that too I don’t remember when or how I discovered it) I do remember having a period where I questioned myself though, where I felt I had to prove it to myself somehow, that I didn’t just make up things for mysef because I wasn’t even sure what attraction actually feels like xp When it comes to romance and sexuality, I still keep discovering new things about myself and getting a clearer picture every day, even now that I’ve been able to confidently pick a label for years to present myself as, and as for my gender, I’ve given up on trying to figure that out xp
I really Love your attittude. I’m not sure, but I feel like there is some kind of stigma around being trans but not doing surgery? Am I right there? (Also sorry for derailing this thread even further stop me if it goes out of hand xp)
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Putting yourself on the line to live life as a publicly trans person has to be the bravest thing you can do.
However, I would like to dismantle this need for feminine beauty to include make up, breasts, jaw surgery, hormones, etc, etc, etc, until you shaved of all your imperfections. This is a huge conversation about “passing” and probably not the best place to have it, you’re right.
And again. If you want to change your body in any way, I respect that choice and hope to make it safe and possible for you to do that.
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My copy finally arrived today 
I managed to read the first two chapters already but I’m really looking forward to going at a slower pace from now on, that was quite exhausting haha
That part was so relatable. For me that moment was when I was beginning to have my first suspicions about being trans/nonbinary and read an interview with an agender person that perfectly summarised my own experiences regarding gender. That was the first time I ever heard about someone having similar experiences as me and I felt so incredibly understood, quite an emotional moment.
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I have a question about the word 抱く, which comes up a lot in chapter 2 around page 50. Apparently that word has three readings with slightly different connotations (だく seems more sexual than いだく, from what I’ve read on jisho and weblio). How do you know which reading to use? Is only one of them common, or do you have to figure it out from context? Or doesn’t it really matter?
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I’m sorry I meant to ask this in my session today but I completely forgot.
Have you try enter the sentence into
ichi.moe (It’s a website.) It might tell you the best pronunciation.
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I don’t know how comfortable you are with a monolingual dictionary, but for determining differences between similar words they can be really helpful.
The main two readings for 抱く are だく and いだく. Below are the definitions in 大辞林 (with my loose translations):
だく
①両腕を回して物を中にかかえこむ。To hold something in one’s arms.
②男が女と肉体関係を持つ。For a man to have physical relations with a woman.
③仲間に引き入れる。To win someone over to one’s side.
いだく
①「だく①」の文語的な言い方。A literary way of saying だく①.
②ある考え・気持ちを心の中にもつ。To have a thought or feeling.
For what it’s worth, in my experience だく is usually used in the literal (physical) sense, while いだく is used in the abstract (feeling) sense. For example, glancing through 獣の奏者 I see:
だく
卵のようにだく
母親にだかれる
竪琴をだく
試作品をだく
膝をだいてすわる
いだく
誇りをいだく
恐れをいだく
疑いをいだく
疑念をいだく
To differentiate from the sexual meaning of だく, you’ll also see 抱きしめる・だきしめる for “to hug”.
I’m not reading along, so unfortunately I don’t have context to know which version you’re seeing, but I hope this is helpful.
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I never thought about using that website for figuring out pronunciation, thanks for that tip!
Thank you, that was really helpful! Monolingual dictionaries still seem a bit daunting to me but I guess it’s time to get over that fear, they’re probably much more helpful for nuances like that than bilingual ones.
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Yes, I definitely wouldn’t doubt that. I should’ve used ‘passing’ to be clear. Thank you for explaining ^^
Also at one point I think I remember seeing actual furigana for it in the manga to make it clear probably, and I’m pretty sure they were いだく
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I don’t know if you’re still looking for books/manga to read but I found a manga that I think looks good for this club, ガンバレ中村くん. It’s about Nakamura who is closeted but falls in love at first sight with his classmate and how he tries to get to know him better, but because he’s awkward it doesn’t always work out the way he wants it to.
I haven’t read it myself but I do own it and intend to read it at some point as it’s only one volume. The English translation has also received good reviews with most people commenting that it’s funny and sweet.
The art work is lovely as well, it’s more of a retro style, similar to Ranma1/2.
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I’m sold on the cover… files this away for my personal collection…
But yes yes yes, always accepting recommendations.
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I have to be honest, due to the art style his hair reminded me of Mamoru’s 
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I also really like the art style!
And the fact that’s it’s only one volume. 
Although Wikipedia mentions a sequel…? But I can’t find the sequel on Amazon. Or even not on bookmeter.
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The art style is so nostalgic. I also liked it cause it’s so refreshing to see something different plus it’s high quality drawing as well.
My lazy brain likes the idea of one volume but if it’s as good as all the reviews say then once you finish it there’s no more to read 
Same here, I had a look for the sequel on several sites. All I could think was that maybe it’s not been collected into a Tankōbon yet? Also given that it started serialisation in 2017 it’s maybe only going to be one volume again seeing as no book exists yet…?
If I do manage to find the sequel I’ll share a link.
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But shouldn’t they get enough material for one volume in 3 years already…? 
I’ve checked Opera’s, the magazine, website. Volume 70 seems to be the last to have もっとガンバレ！ in the table of contents:
https://akaneshinsha.com/opera/opera/opera070/
And it was back in 2018/11/29.
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I really thought they should have, which is why I looked for the book and was surprised it didn’t exist.
I found the mangaka, 春泥, on twitter. They don’t seem to be on hiatus or anything and I have seen tweets from people asking about もっとガンバレ中村くん and when will there be a Tankōbon or just more of it in general so I don’t think there is any official updates on it.
Looking through the tweets as well volume 70 does indeed seem to be the last time it appears in Opera.
Unless Nakamura is a side project for them and they don’t work on it all the time? Hard to know…
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Has anyone reading the current book used a love hotel (or if you’re not reading along, that’s ok too!)? LGBTQ+ friendly sex service? What was it like, especially compared to how events transpired in the book? Does your country have love hotels?
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No experience with any of it, but it was quite interesting to see how a love hotel works. I don’t think we have anything similar in Germany, or at least I’ve never heard of it. Interesting concept though. Does anyone know if the way it was portrayed in the book is representative of the “standard love hotel experience”, if that’s a thing?
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