Thursday, June 23, 2022
Previous senryu
- 「その夢にあんたもいたと妻が泣く」
そのゆめに・あんたもいたと・つまがなく
"You were there / in my dream as well” / cries the wife
Notes:
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to @fallynleaf -
Too many to thank for some really great discussion! So many terrific thoughts and explanations by all. I’m going to go back and highlight some of the better discussions in the “past translations” section of the OP (this one definitely gets a highlight).
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After thinking about it, I realized my confusion wasn’t really about と at all. The root of my confusion was that I unconsciously thought of 泣く as purely intransitive. This was why I thought there were three people involved. I’d have understood 「◯◯」と叫びました instantly, but using the plain form of 泣く, and inserting 妻が between the と and the verb really threw me! As usual, it makes perfect sense in hindsight, but once again it highlights just how “puzzle-like” these poems really are!
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That’s why I especially liked @fallynleaf and @Axazel’s versions: they capture the verb inflection correctly with “cries” rather than making it past-tense with @LaVieQ’s admittedly poetic “wept”. I ended up going with @fallynleaf as that version also captured the と perfectly with quotation marks. Literal translation for the win!
Current senryu challenge
Volume: Global Truths (世の真理編)
220: 「がんばろう生きているから悩めるの」
No serious hints but this somehow reminds me of several aphorisms from my past
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Keep breathing. That’s it. Just. Keep. Breathing. (Quoting my closest friend.)
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From an old “Sales engineer rules of life” tee-shirt from a company now long gone:
- Speed does not kill, but rapid deceleration can be dangerous
- If you live, have kids. Improve the gene pool.
- You can sleep when you die.
- Beer is good food.
(There were ten rules, but these are the only ones I remember.)
Remember to please use the spoiler tag with your translation attempts! Also, please include the reading in kana with your submission.
Everyone is encouraged to participate, no matter your level!
Online tools like dictionaries, sentence databases, and even AI translation engines are fair game and can be extremely helpful. Yomichan is particularly handy if you use the Chrome or Firefox browser. The 語源由来辞典 is also an excellent resource for researching the etymology of various words and expressions.
Here are the links to the 356 Japanese originals (spoiler free) and to the the spreadsheet with all the upcoming senryu as well as the translations to date.