(The increasingly less) Daily senryu thread

Mmmm yes. I can sense the しみじみ :relieved:

1 Like

Sunday, June 5, 2022

Wow. This is what I meant by ebb and flow!

I woke up to so much great discussion this morning, by far my favorite so far.

And thank you for the kind words! As I’m sure is obvious, this thread has become a passion for me. I’ve learned a ton, made several new friends, and it’s just the push I needed to regularly research more about Japanese every day. Without the community I’d never have started the thread, much less continued it daily.


Previous senryu

  1. 我が家の灯しばらく外で眺める
    わがやのとう・しばらくそと・でながめる
    our home’s light: / a while outside to / take it in

Notes:

  • :confetti_ball: to @Arzar33 and @Axazel

  • :trophy: to everyone who participated in this terrific discussion

  • @Arzar33 explained the feeling far better than I can: “The image I get is someone at night looking at their house (husband coming back from work fairly late at night?) contemplating/meditating on the the light coming out, probably thinking happily about their family or something.”

  • It was a tough call, but somehow @Axazel’s wording felt more poetic to me. I did take the liberty of adding a colon. The first stanza sets the scene.

  • I’m starting to think “sentimental” might be better than “heartfelt” for this volume. Such a slippery word to translate

  • I definitely agree with the apparent consensus that the author is staring at the light, rather than outside but in the light, staring outward (「(あかり)に眺める」or 「(あかり)を眺める」 vs.「(あかり)で眺める」). It’s amazing to me that Japanese allows one to leave such an important particle out without breaking the sentence. Though this sort of ambiguity is often intentional with poetry in any language, I suppose.

  • I love, love, love the fact that my question about whether Japanese or English was usually harder when translating these was answered both ways! :grin:

  • “We can’t really tell what reading the writer had in mind but probably, 「ともしび」.” Hah! Like the townspeople in Frankenstein holding torches while storming the castle? Thats an interpretation I hadn’t considered! :rofl:

  • @Rrwrex Seems to have knowledge as to how characters are read in order to fit into 川柳 forms…” heh. hah. hee, hahaha, :joy: :rofl: I struggle with this almost daily, which is why I ask everyone to include the reading with their submission. In this case, though, I think it’s a reading that nobody seems to have suggested: 電灯(でんとう)(とう)!You know, the reading that Wanikani teaches!

  • The reading I provided is 6-6-5 instead of 5-7-5, but I hate splitting the reading of a word.

Current senryu challenge

Volume: Intense

  1. 懐かしい母校の便り寄付依頼

I’m not 100% confident in my reading yet, but I think this one is unlikely to be interpreted in different ways. We will see.


Remember to please use the spoiler tag with your translation attempts! Also, please include the reading in kana with your submission.


Everyone is encouraged to participate, no matter your level!

Online tools like dictionaries, sentence databases, and even AI translation engines are fair game and can be extremely helpful. Yomichan is particularly handy if you use the Chrome or Firefox browser. The 語源(ごげん)由来(ゆらい)辞典(じてん) is also an excellent resource for researching the etymology of various words and expressions.

Here are the links to the 356 Japanese originals (spoiler free) and to the the spreadsheet with all the upcoming senryu as well as the translations to date.

2 Likes

Getting today’s in early, ahead of another hectic week!

なつかしい / ぼこうのたより / きふいらい

nostalgic mail from
alma mater really a
donation request

3 Likes

なつかしい ぼこうのたより きふいらい

4-5-4
Alma mater’s /
donation request: /
feels nostalgic

Edit: Fixed spelling error (feel → feels) that gave it a very different meaning.

1 Like

(なつ)かしい母校(ぼこう)便(たよ)寄付(きふ)依頼(いらい)

mail from my dear
alma mater: “please
give us money”

I feel like I understood the meaning of this one immediately, though I could be wrong :sweat_smile:. I’ve experienced this exact situation many, many times, haha.

I went with a little more informal/indirect translation because the actual wording used on these emails/letters in English is pretty wordy (“make a donation today” etc.). “Please give us money” is how my family has always referred to these letters.

4 Likes

Monday, June 6, 2022

Sorry for the delay. I took a nap right after my workout this morning!


Previous senryu

  1. 懐かしい母校の便り寄付依頼
    なつかしい・ぼこうのたより・きふいらい
    nostalgic mail / from alma mater: / donation plea

Notes:

  • :confetti_ball: to @Axazel (I liked leaving the punchline to the end)
  • :trophy: to @LaVieQ and @fallynleaf
  • I took the liberty of massaging @Axazel’s version into a 3-5-3
  • I was right for a change: we all agreed on the interpretation!
  • 母校(ぼこう) (alma mater) was a new one for me. I guessed the reading right, but had to look up the meaning of the word. Mother school? At first I was thinking a midwifery or something.

Current senryu challenge

Volume: Husbands

  1. 今日帰り今日寝て今日起き今日出勤

This one should be pretty easy for everyone to read.

Only one hint:

I remember this feeling sentiment quite well on a few occasions. I wonder if we’ll all have the same interpretation.


Remember to please use the spoiler tag with your translation attempts! Also, please include the reading in kana with your submission.

Everyone is encouraged to participate, no matter your level!

Online tools like dictionaries, sentence databases, and even AI translation engines are fair game and can be extremely helpful. Yomichan is particularly handy if you use the Chrome or Firefox browser. The 語源(ごげん)由来(ゆらい)辞典(じてん) is also an excellent resource for researching the etymology of various words and expressions.

Here are the links to the 356 Japanese originals (spoiler free) and to the the spreadsheet with all the upcoming senryu as well as the translations to date.

1 Like

きょうかえり きょうねてきょうおき きょうしゅっきん

Ah, the life of a サラリーマン!
4-5-4 translation:

All in a day: / Come home, sleep, wake up / and back to work!

Reminded me of my days in management consulting of long ago…

The Partner in Charge (PIC) of a project/engagement would visit the customer site for a day to ensure “the quality of work done,” or “customer satisfaction” being done by the consulting team on the ground. There was a lot of questioning, criticisms, revisions/corrections, additional tasks, etc. We grunts used to say derisively that the PIC’s (suitably modified with the addition of two more letters) role is to “Blow in! Blow up! And Blow out!” It seemed more a performance for the benefit of the customer executives we were working for, in light of the high consulting rates we were charging them. Our suspicion was (usually, but not always) further buttressed when the PIC would take us out to the local fancy restaurant for an early dinner before his flight/departure and thank us for our hard work. None of the issues from earlier in the day were ever mentioned again. :wink:

Needless to say, I didn’t stay long in that line of work and was glad to get the heck out. Then again, there were several, sharp people who did well for themselves and their customers and who loved that type of work.

Not the same situation, but the 川柳’s rhyme brought to mind that saying…

3 Likes
Summary

きょうかえり きょうねて きょうおき きょうしゅっきん

go home today,
to sleep/ get up
today, to work

I feel its hard to make this one poetic, I don’t know how to replicate the 今日 in English without straight direct translation.

It makes me think of “eat, sleep, work, repeat” but how to make that poetic…

For some reason it wasn’t allowing me to spoiler the text so I hope this works for now, sorry!

edit Got it!

5 Likes

I also would like to say, thank you for running this thread!!! I love looking at it when I’ve got the time. I don’t have the opportunity to post much in the community due to computer issues, but once a week I get a good chance on a computer that actually works haha. Keep up the good work!!

3 Likes

Tuesday, June 7, 2022


Previous senryu

  1. 今日帰り今日寝て今日起き今日出勤
    きょうかえり・きょうねてきょうおき・きょうしゅっきん
    got home today, / slept today, got up / today, to work

Notes:

  • :confetti_ball: to @superelf94 (and thanks for the kind words!)
  • :trophy: to @LaVieQ
  • I took the liberty of changing the tense and adding another today (to make it 4-5-4 while keeping the interpretation)

Current senryu challenge

Volume: Ladies

  1. 半額シール貼る店員の後をつけ

Another one that seems easy enough to understand with I think just one interpretation, but heaven knows I’ve been proven wrong enough times already.

It does seem a little politically incorrect that this is in the “Ladies” volume! I can easily imagine myself doing this in a hardware store.

(あと)をつける is an interesting way to say “tag along” or “to shadow”. I think it literally means to attach (()ける) yourself behind them.


Remember to please use the spoiler tag with your translation attempts! Also, please include the reading in kana with your submission.

Everyone is encouraged to participate, no matter your level!

Online tools like dictionaries, sentence databases, and even AI translation engines are fair game and can be extremely helpful. Yomichan is particularly handy if you use the Chrome or Firefox browser. The 語源(ごげん)由来(ゆらい)辞典(じてん) is also an excellent resource for researching the etymology of various words and expressions.

Here are the links to the 356 Japanese originals (spoiler free) and to the the spreadsheet with all the upcoming senryu as well as the translations to date.

2 Likes

A good day at work! So I have a little extra free time/energy today and would like to spend it here.

はんがくしーる / はるてんいんの / あとをつけ

trail behind
the clerk applying
half-off tags

3 Likes

Nice!

I think this 4-5-4 parses slightly better than your 3-5-3, even though it’s nearly identical:

I trail behind
the clerk applying
half-off stickers

Somehow it seems like the English version needs a subject, else it sounds slightly like a command.

2 Likes

How did I know you would say that? :rofl:

What can I say? I was greedy trying for the 3-5-3, and I agree that the 4-5-4 is the ideal version :relieved:

1 Like

Great minds think alike?

1 Like

はんがくシールはるてんいんのあとをつく

4-5-4
Shadowing the / store staff as they stick / “Half off!” tags on

Reminded me of the days of 円高 (when the¥was strong against the $), when groups of women from Japan used to visit the US for shopping. They would wander around the department stores smiling and saying 「やすいね! やすい!」and such to each other - even encountered a few a couple of times at Filene’s.

2 Likes

Wednesday, June 8, 2022


Previous senryu

  1. 半額シール貼る店員の後をつけ
    はんがく・シールはるてんいんの・あとをつく
    Shadowing the / store staff applying / “Half off!” stickers

Notes:

  • :confetti_ball: to @LaVieQ with a 3-5-3 at the end
  • :trophy: to @Axazel with a quick 3-5-3 out of the gate
  • I still couldn’t keep myself from rewording slightly. ごめん!
  • The final form definitely benefitted from the team wordsmithing, I think.

Current senryu challenge

Volume: Seniors

  1. 孫の名に変えて絵本を読んでやる

This makes me miss my grandson! I don’t know if my kanji is improving or we are just on a lucky streak with simple words, but I haven’t had to look up many words for the past few days.


Remember to please use the spoiler tag with your translation attempts! Also, please include the reading in kana with your submission.

Everyone is encouraged to participate, no matter your level!

Online tools like dictionaries, sentence databases, and even AI translation engines are fair game and can be extremely helpful. Yomichan is particularly handy if you use the Chrome or Firefox browser. The 語源(ごげん)由来(ゆらい)辞典(じてん) is also an excellent resource for researching the etymology of various words and expressions.

Here are the links to the 356 Japanese originals (spoiler free) and to the the spreadsheet with all the upcoming senryu as well as the translations to date.

1 Like

This one is so lovely. The perfect poem for the end of a good day :city_sunset:

まごのな / にかえてえほん / をよんてやる

with my grandchild’s
name swapped in the book
I’ll read to them

I almost misread やる for いる! :face_with_open_eyes_and_hand_over_mouth: That changed the meaning a little bit, especially once I found out that 〜て遣る (〜てやる) has a definition that I never studied before which is “to give (esp. to someone of equal or lower status), to let have, to present, to bestow, to confer”

思い遣り is the same reading and has a lightly similar theme of “for other people”. Thought I’d add it here just in case anyone’s like me and can use this to help them remember later!

3 Likes

That verb is easy for me to remember.

「やてくれる?」was a common refrain from my kids growing up (and from me asking somebody to do something for me).

1 Like

Haha Well, add くれる and I’m there with you! One of my friend’s favorite thing to say is 「やめてくれませんか? 」in the sweetest tone and with a big smiling face. It makes me laugh so hard every time.

Hearing about you missing your grandson and mention about when your kids were young touches my heart :sparkles: I hope you get to see him again soon!

1 Like

Wow, for once I actually knew all of the words!

(まご)()()えて絵本(えほん)()んでやる

reading to
my grandchild, swapping
in their name

4 Likes